A contact of mine in Google Talk (well, Gaim technically) had as an away message recently, "things happen in threes", or something to that effect. I must be especially blessed lately, because after only having a few weddings in the last five or six years, I now have four weddings to attend in the next 8-9 months or so, with another that I am not sure if I am invited to or not. Of those four, I will be in three of them, which means that I have to rent a tux for each, and the fourth is in Wales, which means no tux rental, but instead plane tickets and hotel rooms and finally having to get my passport.

I found out about Rachel and Dustin's wedding when Rachel called me about going to see a band up the street from my house. Later, I was over at the Chandler's house playing on their computer, when Dareke walked up to me and showed me her ring finger. I stared for a full five seconds, with the only thought in my head being "Why is she showing me this ring? I mean, I guess it's a nice ring and all, but so what?", until realization finally dawned. A few weeks later I was walking at the Shades Creek Greenway, when I heard a wolf whistle from behind me. I turned to see Jerry and Lori jogging up, a sly smirk on Jerry's face. As they passed, asking if I wanted to jog with them for a while, Lori said "Hey Jay!" and began to wave in an odd manner, with the top of her hand facing me, fingers doing cheerleader "sprinkles". Once again, I stared at that odd wave and the sharp, white glints coming from her ring finger for a full five seconds thinking, "Why is she waving like that?", until realization finally dawned. Tess just sent out a straight-forward email, although her fiance did up the ante for the rest of us by proposing on the deck of a castle keep overlooking the city of Cardiff, with the bay and valleys as a backdrop. Then, when she had said yes, he brought out some bacon and egg sandwiches and they ate breakfast overlooking the city. Ah, romance. My sister and her boyfriend are not technically engaged--she has no ring--but have planned to get married around the same time as Mark and Tess and Jerry and Lori; in fact, I might have three weddings in three months if things go according to plan.

All of this is wonderful, of course. I am very happy for my friends and glad that they have found people who love them and make them happy. The problem is me, or more precisely, that I am now one of the last of my ka-tet to be single. This fact is of little or no concern to me, at least in it's most direct sense; I enjoy my singleness and, while I don't discount the possibility of someone coming along to change my mind on the subject, don't see any reason to actively seek an end to it. But, indirectly, it is as if I can now feel the eyes of many begin to turn to me, watching and expectant.

Jerry joked that now that he was engaged, all of Sarah's (a mutual married friend) marriage prayers were now going to be fully directed upon me. Well, I thought he was joking, until my sister reported the same thing after running into Sarah at a birthday party. Others, I'm sure, feel the same way. My gut tells me that I have become the male version of that last unmarried bridesmaid in some people's minds. Maybe it's only good old-fashioned paranoia...

...but, maybe it isn't. Earlier in the summer, Jerry, Lori, and I stopped to eat breakfast at Cracker Barrel on our way down to the beach. This is not tradition mind you, stopping at Cracker Barrel during a road trip, but is instead the law of the land here in the South and you violate this law at your peril. During the breakfast, I mentioned that I had just found out that one of my long time friends, Eric, bassist in every band I was ever in, had recently gotten married somewhat secretly. I joked that of the founding members of chainofsorrow, I had figured I would not have been the last one single, since at the time both Eric and Cary, both now married with kids, were dead set against marriage. Lori's face turned down, and she began to get a pitying look on her face. As her mouth began to form a long "Awwwwwwww", I quickly jumped in and said that I wasn't unhappy about it, I just thought it was interesting and ironic. But that reaction stuck with me. It isn't that I am uncomfortable with my singleness, but I have a growing feeling that everyone thinks I am, which makes me uncomfortable, which I then think people are interpreting as uncomfortability with being single. 'Tis a viscious cycle, aye?

Aye, 'tis.